the following are random thoughts currently occupying the limited space in my mind, and things i’d like to write about later but shouldn’t/can’t/won’t given the required writing that’s past due (i shouldn’t even be writing this at the moment seeing as i’m doing this instead of making most of my time by continuing my literature review while waiting for my client to arrive. but if you’ve learned anything about me in the almost 2 years of exploration and musings, it’s that tell me i shouldn’t or can’t and i will…even if the directive comes from Clouds herself…myself…whatever, you get the point. this is an oh-so-obv attempt at continued (self) defiance and procrastination, which upon recognizing, i have just decided to stop).
random thoughts for the moment:
- self control is ((obv)) not my forte…but i’m getting better
- i really wish you’d fight for me
- coffee and dating don’t mix well; how do you distinguish the physiological feelings in your tummy and heart as being due to butterflies & excitement or caffeine & indigestion?
- sometimes i wish you could see that there’s a fine line between where my help ends and your personal responsibility begins
- listening to Explosions in the Sky and God is an Astronaut expands my heart alotta bit
- i really want to go to a jazz club/place/lounge/whatever the cool kids are calling it these days. Jazz music also expands my heart. a lottle.
- grad school gets in the way of my learning…mah-jor-lee
- eff you, school. i’m super excited/passionate/feeling nerdy about my dissertation. i want to read, think, and write as much as i can on the topic. so i will.
- i have more self control than i given myself credit for. as evidenced by my choices in this very moment. because, at the end of the day, that’s all that actually matters
adios, folks. off to be productive.
i’ll leave you with a little something to ponder as you continue about your day. Mr. Akst made me think of redefining or re-examining how i looked at self control by introducing this idea of speed and friction. maybe self-control has less to do with control in the power-over-something sense of the word and more about slowing down.